Tonight I was doing my nightly roaming around autism blogs, reading about other people’s own experiences, and wondering if anyone had anything similar to me. Usually what I end up finding is the worst case scenario, and that throws me into a tizz – What if that happens to Alexa??
So, I was told to stop reading them by my husband, my sister, my best friend and my 2 favourite autism support workers. But one thing I did read really had me thinking.
Apparently, 1 in 68 Americans have autism. That really shocked me in two aspects. The first being, wow that’s really good chance for someone to be born with autism. Like really. If the max of a classroom is 34 people in New Brunswick, that means if they were full to capacity in a school, 1 child for ever 2 classrooms should have autism. That’s nuts. That’s a really good chance it’s going to happen to someone you know… Not just someone, but multiple people.
The second aspect that I thought about… Was why was Alexa selected to be that 1. She had 67 other ways her genetics could have went. But somehow the combination that Stephen and I put together made our child have a development disorder… And the “Whoa as me” comes into play now.
Another thing that I found interesting is there is no actual statistical data for Canada. Apparently someone out there somewhere is looking into it, but the government website uses the American statistic. Basically saying 1% or 1 in 68. So is that accurate in Canada? And I would love to see that broken down by province.
So, some days I feel like I won the lottery— I have the best child in this whole damn planet. Other days, I feel like I drew the short straw – as in why does she have to have this struggle I cannot take away? I hate her having to struggle, and I cannot stop it. It just is. And I hate it. (Still have the best child in the whole damn planet no matter how we slice they pie though!)
But, no matter how I look at, I will always remember what my cousin said to me. She is not different. She learns different. And that’s OK.
I love my little 1 in 68. She is a blessing. She is a gift. She is my everything.
And as I close off this blog, a song lyric floats into my head… Alexa “I love you just the way you are”.